This post is going to be totally random but whatever.

We had breakfast for dinner tonight. I love doing that. Even though pancakes make me feel kind of sick. Speaking of being sick, I think I'm getting sick. I had really bad chest pains for a couple days and I was freaking out cause I didn't know what it was. But last night started coughing and it was sort of a wheezing cough so that's  probably why I had chest pains..I hope. I really hope because I ran today despite it hurting because I figured if it's from getting sick it must not be too serious. I don't like not exercising. It makes me feel sicker haha. It seriously taking me 30 minutes to type this. I type a sentence, wait for the computer to respond and make words show up, then wait some more for it to stop freaking out.

It seems like every time I watch a movie lately I start crying at some point at the smallest, most insignificant things. I was bawling at the end of Gattaca today. I think I cried at the end of Pinocchio too. On another off note, there is a preview for Spiceworld before Gattaca. Old school.

Sooooo pumped! Going to see the Decemberists tomorrow wif mah ma and pa! They love them too but maybe not as much as me :] I was getting music off my dad's computer one day and I saw that he had a couple Decemberists albums..the ones I didn't have. It was a delightful surprise.

Goal for 2011: ambidexterity.

It only took me 5 minutes to master using chopsticks with my non-dominant hand (left) and last year I took my notes with my left hand. Well actually notes were split. Right page = right hand, left page = left hand. It's more convenient.  So really my goal is to match the dexterity of my left hand with my right hand.

I've always wanted to fill a shoe box with my favorite trinkets. Like little things passed down from my grandma. Some valuable stuff too. And then I'd bury the box in the ground for someone to find years from now when everything inside is priceless and wonderful to whoever finds it.

I feel bad for pet fish. What a boring life. They just swim in circles and occasionally get transferred to a different bowl to clean the old one..but only for a half hour or so. Most of my fish died the first day I had them. It was traumatizing for an 8 year old to lose fish that quickly right after I named them. I named one John after my uncle. He died in one day. Sunshine also died the same day. They probably died of boredom. I should have given them some video games to play. Or jacks. Can fish play jacks? I should have found out.  At least they would die in an exciting way.

I hate family. I hate having to repeat myself. I hate having to explain everything I do. I hate people calling me Kerstin. I hate people asking me questions. I hate having the TV volume up so loud I can hear it in the attic. I hate how everyone has to yell for my grandpa to hear them. I hate how people force me to eat. I hate how it takes 2 hours to look for a movie that no one even wants to watch. I hate the Waltons. I hate Animal Planet. I hate the Inspiration channel. I hate gospel music. I hate how my sister talks like a baby to old people.  I hate sharing my bathroom with my grandpa. I hate how I can't sleep. I hate how I cry when I sing. I hate how my laptop is too slow to play Tetris or any other games. I hate how I can't read when people are yelling. I hate having to eat left overs because other people are having seafood. I hate when people yell at me for eating too fast. I hate how there are too many cookies in the house. I hate that I don't dance or fence anymore. I hate that I haven't finished a book since November. I hate that I haven't read a book since December. I hate how food makes me so sick.  I hate how I can't beat Gohma. I hate that I can't finish anything. I hate that I haven't finished any piece of music I've written. I hate that I've never made central districts and everyone acts so surprised. I hate that I'm awful at violin and people think I'm good. I hate pizza. I hate how my hands get sweaty when I run. I hate how I think of Sarah Palin every time someone mentions Alaska.  I hate football. I hate golf. I hate people who are obsessed with material wealth. I hate yoga pants that aren't being worn for yoga.  I hate how I have brown fur stuck to the bottom of my feet after I wear my boots. I hate how my cousins think I love cheetah print when I absolutely hate it. I hate metal silverware. I hate fat lazy cats. I hate fish, dead or alive. I hate chick flicks. I hate pink. I hate Nicholas Cage.  I hate being told what to do. I hate having to wash my clothes. I hate not being able to go outside because its below zero.  I hate the way my sister laughs. I hate sleeping with my window closed. I hate being nice to people when I really want to hit them. I hate hauling percussion equipment off trucks. I hate not wearing gloves outside. I hate that my mom steals my socks. I hate handing out programs. I hate adults that assume I'm an idiot and I don't know anything. I hate chairs and stands. I hate that oboist.  I hate that my violin doesn't fit in my locker with my viola. I hate how inconsiderate people are because they're so selfish. I hate that my parents butt into my personal life. I hate how I don't have any really close friends. I hate how my hands smell after I eat pizza.  I hate studying for midterms. I hate failing classes. I hate being asked what my favorite things are. I hate how the front left burner on the stove doesn't turn on so it leaks gas for a few seconds and makes the whole kitchen smell like death. I hate how the little red bowls can't go in the microwave. I hate sponges. I hate dirty dish water. I hate American Idol. I hate 99% of famous female vocalists. I hate sharing a bus with chorus kids. I hate talking about college. I hate talking to strangers.  I hate interviews. I hate heart burn. I hate stretch marks. I hate growing. I hate my wisdom teeth. I hate that my dentist said I'm not getting my wisdom teeth out. I hate 4th finger on viola. I hate flossing. I hate brushing my teeth. I hate turning on the light when I shower. I hate that I have no ass.  I hate that I don't own nice clothes. I hate that I don't want to spend money on nice clothes. I hate that I want nice clothes. I hate that I don't own thick enough gloves so I have to double them up. I hate that my sister thinks she's funny and has my dad's sense of humor but she doesn't at all and she's not funny. I hate that I can't remember my dreams. I hate that my dreams aren't real. I hate that I have to eat. I hate that I don't chew my food. I hate that I've never broken any bones, choked, or passed out for more than a minute. I hate that I never ride my bike anymore. I hate that I don't have enough money for nice roller skates. I hate that I probably have enough money for roller skates but I haven't got around to getting them. I hate that I haven't got my license yet. I hate chocolate cake. I hate fondant. I hate cities. I hate large groups of people. I hate people. I hate New York City. I hate French. I hate France. I hate French people. I hate French Fries. I hate that I hate French Fries because I had I bad dream about them. I hate baby carrots because they look like dry, dehydrated flesh. I hate that I love steak but I'm a vegetarian. I hate that I don't get a car until sophomore year of college. I hate eye drops. I hate that I feel nauseous 12 hours a day. I hate that I have to take antidepressants. I hate that I chose to play violin instead of harp. I hate that I quit cello. I hate that I didn't get a 5 string electric violin. I hate that I love him and I don't do anything about it. I hate Netflix. I hate that I look like my mom. I hate that my eyes won't turn green until I'm older. I hate that my blue blanket leaves fuzz on everything. I hate how people yell at me and tell me what to do in college. I hate that I took advice from that stupid guy who told me not to major in music. I hate how he told me music is only a hobby for me. I hate adults, all of them. I hate how I don't eat things after the expiration date. I hate snow. I hate technology. I hate fluorescent lights. I hate eye strain. I hate how the Nordic Track makes my right calf hurt more than my left. I hate lower back pain. I hate that I never took gymnastics because my mom wouldn't let me. I hate that this list is so long. I hate that I hate everything.

UNH>UVM
UNH is giving me way more money and it's less expensive in the first place, it have a better music department is I ever want to do that, and it has lots of good food. It's just not in a location like UVM. I like big green mountains, not the ocean and rocks.  But if it's cheaper I don't care. The people are a little different but oh well..I'll have to deal. 

I'm afraid I won't make any friends. But I guess I'll figure that out when I actually go to college.

I have a phone interview for a college tomorrow at 3. I'm kind of freaking out because I've never had an interview before... I don't even want to go to this college but my goal is to get into all 5 colleges I applied to and this will be the 5th.  I gotta make myself sound cool: I'm a figure skater from Ethiopia but was raised in Lebanon, moved to America at age 7 and began pursuing Olympic curling at age 8. I then won 5 gold medals and met president Obama at his inauguration and sang him patriotic songs beside Aretha Franklin.

I think that will do.